tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4408173005735092094.post120113593078872900..comments2023-06-08T11:35:59.403-05:00Comments on I am Asher. I am the Light.: Hurricane IkeAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14760872868260214241noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4408173005735092094.post-56458294962544180892008-09-26T09:25:00.000-05:002008-09-26T09:25:00.000-05:00Saw this..thought of you! :)DragonRecipes for our...Saw this..thought of you! :)<BR/>Dragon<BR/><BR/>Recipes for our next storm party…<BR/><BR/> <BR/><BR/>MANDATORY EVACUATION <BR/> 1 1/2 oz. Absolute Ruby Red vodka <BR/> 1/2 oz. vermouth <BR/> Clamato <BR/> Prune juice <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> Combine vodka and vermouth in cocktail glass. Fill remainder of <BR/> glass with equal parts Clamato and prune juice. Stir. Drink. Ask next-door neighbor,whose oak tree blew over and crashed onto your roof - even though you'd warned him for months to uproot it, if you can use his bathroom. Repeat. <BR/> ============================================================ <BR/> CATEGORY 5 <BR/> 1/2 oz. vodka <BR/> 1/2 oz. tequila <BR/> 1/2 oz. rum <BR/> 1/2 oz. bourbon <BR/> 1/2 oz. gin <BR/> Sweet-and-sour mix <BR/> Splash of fruit juice <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> Combine vodka, tequila, rum, bourbon and gin in a tall glass. <BR/> Fill remainder of glass with sweet-and-sour mix and splash of juice. Stir, then <BR/> garnish with an inverted drink umbrella. Drink during peak storm <BR/> hours, and vow not<BR/> to believe anyone who tries to tell you the hurricane that <BR/> flooded your<BR/> garage and destroyed your shed was just a Category 1. <BR/> ============================================================ <BR/> CONE OF PROBABILITY <BR/> 1 oz. cinnamon schnapps <BR/> 1 sugar cone <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> Pour the schnapps into the sugar cone. Every time you hear a TV <BR/> weatherman say, 'cone of probability,' bite off the end of the <BR/> cone and down the shot.<BR/> If you hear Jim Cantore say it, drink two shots consecutively. <BR/> (they should<BR/> change this to the 'Cantore Zone'... damn him. Have you ever <BR/> noticed that,<BR/> despite all the cone of probability talk, if Cantore is parked <BR/> in front of your house your *ss is toast?) <BR/> ============================================================ <BR/> FEEDER BAND <BR/> 2 oz. Midori <BR/> 2 oz. rum <BR/> 1 scoop vanilla ice cream <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> After your home loses power, combine Midori and rum in a cocktail glass. Add a scoop of the vanilla ice cream that is melting in your freezer. Stir and drink through a straw. <BR/> ============================================================ <BR/> BEACH EROSION <BR/> 1 1/2 oz. Goldschläger <BR/> 1 1/2 oz. apple brandy <BR/> 1 pack Sugar in the Raw <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> Combine Goldschläger, apple brandy and sugar in cocktail glass. As you drink, seriously contemplate moving your Yankee *ss back to NewJersey where it belongs. <BR/> ============================================================ <BR/> DOWNED POWER LINE <BR/> 1 1/2 oz. rum <BR/> 5 oz. Jolt Cola <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> Combine ingredients in a cocktail glass. Drink while trying to <BR/> figure out<BR/> how the heck you're supposed to go two freakin' weeks without <BR/> television and AC. <BR/> ============================================================ <BR/> FLOOD ZONE <BR/> 2 oz. Kahlúa <BR/> 2 oz. Baileys Irish cream <BR/> 4 oz. rum <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> Serve in a 6-ounce glass and laugh-cry deliriously as the mess <BR/> spills all<BR/> over the countertop. <BR/> ============================================================ <BR/> COLD SHOWER <BR/> 2 oz. Blue Aftershock <BR/> 4 oz. Sprite <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> Combine in a cocktail glass with crushed ice you received after <BR/> waiting in<BR/> line for three hours at a mall parking lot. Take a deep breath, <BR/> sip and<BR/> scream like a little girl when the cold beverage hits your <BR/> tongue. Repeat. <BR/> ============================================================ <BR/> LOOTERS WILL BE SHOT <BR/> 1 oz. Jack Daniel's <BR/> Splash of sarsaparilla <BR/> Rock salt <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> Load both barrels of a shotgun with rock salt. Climb to the <BR/> roof of your<BR/> house with gun, bottle of Jack Daniel's and can of sarsaparilla. <BR/> Fill shot<BR/> glass with Jack and splash of sarsaparilla. Watch for looters. <BR/> When you spot<BR/> one, blast his ass with rock salt. Drink shot. Repeat. <BR/> ============================================================ <BR/> THE CHAIN SAW <BR/> 1 oz. Goldschläger <BR/> 1 oz. Rumplemintz <BR/> 3 oz. Jim Beam <BR/> Splash of vermouth <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> Combine Goldschläger, Rumplemintz and Jim Beam in an empty soup <BR/> can. Add<BR/> splash of vermouth. Drink. Remove chain saw from garage and <BR/> attempt to cut<BR/> up fallen tree limbs in yard. Ask neighbor to drive you to <BR/> hospital when it<BR/> all goes horribly wrong. <BR/> ============================================================ <BR/> FOUR-WAY STOP <BR/> 1 1/2 oz. vodka <BR/> 1 1/2 oz. vodka and Midori <BR/> 1 1/2 oz. vodka and Galliano <BR/> 1 1/2 oz. vodka and grenadine <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> Pour each ingredient into a separate shot glass. Serve one to <BR/> yourself and<BR/> three other people. The person with the clear shot of vodka <BR/> drinks first.<BR/> The person to his right drinks the Midori shot, and so on. If somebody<BR/> drinks out of order, develop a quick case of road rage and beat <BR/> the living<BR/> crap out of him. <BR/> ============================================================ <BR/> BLUE TARP <BR/> 1 1/2 oz. Curacao <BR/> 2 oz. pineapple juice <BR/> Splash of lime <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> Combine ingredients in a leaky paper cup and serve. Wait six to <BR/> eight months<BR/> for someone to repair the cup. If you're impatient, hire an <BR/> unlicensed, out-of-state contractor to do the job for an <BR/> exorbitant sum and pray he<BR/> doesn't hurt himself in the process. <BR/> ============================================================ <BR/> FEMA FIZZLE <BR/> 1 oz. Southern Comfort <BR/> 2 oz. sloe gin <BR/> Tonic water <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> <BR/> One week after the storm has passed and your neighborhood is <BR/> still in ruins<BR/> with no sign of help on the way, combine Southern Comfort and <BR/> gin in a<BR/> cocktail glass. Fill remainder with tonic and add a dash of Angostura<BR/> bitters. Serve with a nut brownie. Before drinking, raise the <BR/> glass and say<BR/> the toast, 'Doing a heckuva job Brownie'Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4408173005735092094.post-86492643776868935452008-09-12T22:13:00.000-05:002008-09-12T22:13:00.000-05:00You hang in there buddy! looks like a direct hit o...You hang in there buddy! looks like a direct hit on Galveston/Houston. Wishing you the best.<BR/><BR/>TrinkitAnonymousnoreply@blogger.com